Change to Third Mindfulness Training on “True Love”

Our local dharma teacher, Dave Hughes, has brought our attention to a letter from Brother Thay Phap Dung to the international dharma teachers concerning revisions to the third mindfulness training, on “True Love.” We’ve revised the current version of the five mindfulness trainings on our site to reflect these changes.

These changes were initiated to be more inclusive of our LGBTQIA+ community.

Here are the changes:

1. Added the phrase “mutual consent” to the phrase, “I am determined not to engage in sexual relations without mutual consent, true love, and a deep, long-term commitment. 

2. Instead of the phrase, “. . . and a deep, long-term commitment made known to my family and friends,” it adds the sentence, “I resolve to find spiritual support for the integrity of my relationship from family members, friends, and sangha with whom there is support and trust.”

3. In the fifth sentence of the revised training, instead of the phrase, “Seeing that body and mind are one . . .” it uses the phrase, “Seeing that body and mind are interrelated . . .”.

4. The rest of this same sentence has been slightly re-organized (this doesn’t seem to alter the content):

Old version: “I am committed to learning appropriate ways to take care of my sexual energy and cultivating loving kindness, compassion, joy and inclusiveness – which are the four basic elements of true love – for my greater happiness and the greater happiness of others.”

New version: “I am committed to learning appropriate ways to take care of my sexual energy and to cultivating the four basic elements of true love – loving kindness, compassion, joy, and inclusiveness – for the greater happiness of myself and others.”

5. Added the following new statement:

“Recognizing the diversity of human experience, I am committed not to discriminate against any form of gender identity or sexual orientation.”

So, the whole third mindfulness training now reads (bold indicates additions or moved text):

Aware of the suffering caused by sexual misconduct, I am committed to cultivating responsibility and learning ways to protect the safety and integrity of individuals, couples, families, and society. Knowing that sexual desire is not love, and that sexual activity motivated by craving always harms myself as well as others, I am determined not to engage in sexual relations without mutual consent, true love, and a deep, long-term commitment. I resolve to find spiritual support for the integrity of my relationship from family members, friends, and sangha with whom there is support and trust. I will do everything in my power to protect children from sexual abuse and to prevent couples and families from being broken by sexual misconduct. Seeing that body and mind are interrelated, I am committed to learning appropriate ways to take care of my sexual energy and to cultivating the four basic elements of true love – loving kindness, compassion, joy, and inclusiveness – for the greater happiness of myself and others. Recognizing the diversity of human experience, I am committed not to discriminate against any form of gender identity or sexual orientation. Practicing true love, we know that we will continue beautifully into the future.